Wednesday, December 30, 2009

what happen in 6 months?

well..well.. again, i went out and dissapear myself from any updates on my blog.. well, my blog is not that active anyways.. so, it's no biggie if i didn't update it right..?? n reading my last post, which was in! how things have changed since then!!! ahahahaha..

to start with, let's update what happen to BGB n AZ ya! BGB... hmm.. i didn't see him anymore ever since that incident at IKEA, don't know why.. i guess, that's just the way GOD wants me to move on with my life.. oh, i did saw him once.. once at oldtown, n that was when i discover that Taufiq is friends with him.. lol go figure! but who cares about him anymore, right..?? lol

anyways, my life starts to be more exciting ever since then.. a few months later, i started talking to this one ex-schoolmate of mine, or better said a senior of mine.. hmm.. let's call him SENIOR ya.. well, we started talking n messaging lik every single day, n true enough, i started to develop feelings for him.. i'm not gonna lie about that.. but people kept on telling me that i can find someone better than that... n i heard that alot! n of course, i started to have doubts on him.. thinking about the future n stuff.. not that i'm saying that he'll not have a reat future or anything, it's just that i'm afraid that i can't cope with my dreams that i have in the future, if we ever get together.. without me telling him about it, he started to grew apart.. but he's still there alright, but there's less conversation between us..

n i think the only reason we didn't get together or the reason why he still waited for the right moment to make it official between us is the fact thati was waiting for my 1000th day of singlehood... haha.. yeap! i counted my single days.. how's that? lol..

ok, coming back to the story, well.... when we started to grew apart little by little, there's this other guy who came along in my life.. at first, it was just a total fling, n i can totally sense that i guess.. let's not name him just yet ya cos it's gonna be a little more interesting later.. hihihi..

where did i meet him? well, he's also a dancer for SAKTI.. but you wanna know something weird..?? if u ask me to recall what can i remember about him during the festival tari, well, i can't remember anything about him.. seriously, i can't recall him in my memory.. lol.. like KEM said, he's my blindspot.. lol.. n we gre closer since the first sem 2nd year, after the midterm break.. n that was when we started flirting n stuff like that..

true enough, he sometimes text me, but i never really take that seriously.. but i started to feel about weird when he dun mind hanging out with me n my frens.. it's weird considering that a guy that ur jus getting to know would not mind hanging out with ur frens.. n then during his birthday, i did a surprise party for him, considering the fact that a week before that, he joined in the surprise party for kim misa n nurul..

n then, we started to get closer.. hanging out with him almost every night.. n that was when i started to get to know his frens too.. well, his frens are dancers to, so it's not that awkward hanging out with them..

there were time when i felt like, ok, maybe he's not that interested in me.. maybe he really is just flirting with me all this while.. so, there were times when i feel like, that's it! i'm soooo over him.. what's the point of waiting for a guy who is not showing signs that he wanted me the way i want him right.. but that was when he'll be even closer to me.. n yeah, i had lost to my own feelings, n yeah the feelings were developing even greater than before.. lol

but i know, that he's not gonna make our relationship official anytime soon.. so, i was just holding on the thoughts to myself.

n then, my birthday came along... at 12 a.m on 18th nov, which was my birthday, they made a surprise for me at buddies.. n that was when SENIOR came in the picture.. he came all the way to cyber, just to see me, n give me roses n chocs for me... how sweet is that.. n that made me a little bit restless after SENIOR went back, because i was hoping that the guy that i was liking would do something sweet for me.. bt then, it ended up, that SENIOR guy was making the move.. huhuhu..

HOWEVER..... after the surprise, when we were going back to the hostel, with only kem, me n that guy in the car, that guy told me that he wanted to talk to me n just hang out a little bit more with me before i went back to the hostel.. i'm so fine with it, because i can sense he wanted to tell me something even before we're going back to the hostel.. so, after sending off kem to the hostel, we head off to oldtown, only th two of us.. n that was around 4 in the morning.. i can sense that he was restless at the time.. but i was just keeping my cool, n i didn't say anything much.. hihi..

after almost one hour of being restless n me just keeping my cool,(lol), he blurted it out.. he wanted to make it official between us n he wanted to make me his special someone.. hihihihihiihihihhi.. n guess what's my answer is....

OF COURSE I'LL SAY YES!!!!!! hahahhaa.. but i jus didn't tell him directly, i wrote it on the oldtown ordering paper n gave it to him... hik2.. how sweet can i be..???? lol

so, yeah i can soooo name him now... he's my BOOBOO!!!!! hahaha.. finally we're officially together.. n after 1050 days of being single, i finally met my knight in shining armour @ hero @ edward cullen, whichever i prefer like calling.. lol..

of course i'm sooo totally into him!!! for me, the great thins about being with him is that we love each other n stuff, but we still have other responsibilities and things to do apart from being together.. that is the one thing that i was finding really hard in any guy that i met.. cos i'm not a clingy person, n i sooo do not want a clingy, yeah, he fits in perfectly... n I LOVE HIM SOOO MUCH!! hihihi.. we've been on this road together for 1 month plus now, it's still a very raw n fresh relationships, so yeah everything is still sailing smoothly n hoping it'll stay like that.. ihihi..

n that's one of the best story to wrap up 2009.... eventhough it contradicts my 2009's resolution, which was to not go looking for a bf, but hey, i'm super..super..happy about it...

hoping that i will keep updating my blog from now on.. lol..

-the end-

LOVING U MY BOOBOO!(u know who u r) =)

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

trouble is a friend of mine! totally!!

this was another incident that really hit my head pretty hard..

my sis and i went to watch JANGAN PANDANG BELAKANG CONGKAK, with two of my sis's friends; mamu n bob.. the movie was absolutely brilliant and fantastic.. it was super hillarious, and i couldn't stop laughing.. too bad it was not a full houe that day, cos it was a morning show.. cos if it was a full house i bet the people will go wild.. haihh.. bt seriously that movie was amazing.. what's with my favourite actor acted in that movie, shaheizy sam.. <3.. *sigh* lol..

the whole story was hilarious!! seriously, i think i don't mind watching it again and again.. so, if u people wanna go and watch that movie, count me in, k! lol

but, that's not what i wanna talked about.. it was what happened after the movie was the interesting part.. and it really ruined my happy moments after watching that show..

after the movie, we went to ikea, to eat at the food court place there.. oh, btw, we watched the movie at cineleisure, so it was just a walking distance to ikea..
so, we went there and had our lunch there.. pretty awesome foods too there in ikea.. hehehe..

after eating, we were just sitting around, talking..and talking.. and sometimes we will go n check out some hot hunks walking past, or just plain sighing when we saw couple who look cute together, with a baby.. oh, how adorable they look.. and that us start wondering, when will our time come to have that happiness.. huhuhu.. but that was not the worst part..

as we were still talking..and talking.. my eyes turned to this one couple walking in the food court.. my heart started pumping really hard, n my blood started to rush in like i really need it as my heart was pumping really hard..

then it hit me that i know that guy!!! he was BGB, walking with another girl into the food court.. then it hit me again, omg, he got a gf!!! or even if she wasn't his gf, i'm sure their totally on a date!

i was in total shock, as i saw them walking and wandering around looking for a place to sit cos it's pretty pack there.. and the whole time i couldn't stop looking at them.. gosh! that really hit me pretty hard..

if u guys couldn't recall who's this BGB, well he's a guy i always had my eyes on since first sem first year.. i don't mean to brag, but according to people around me, he got his eyes on me too.. i mean, just the stare and stuff.. yes, tell me i'm perasan, but that's what i just felt..

BGB had always been in my list, and most of the time, he's always been the only one in my list.. lol.. don't take me wrong here, not that i'm in love with him or whatever.. like i said before, girls are so complicated that having a guy that she can see each day is enough.. not to think about relationships or anything..

oh, nevermind, ignore that list thing.. people will start to think i'm some desperate psycho... lol

so, yeah, in a way, i got broken hearted twice in two weeks, during the two weeks holidays.. first was because of AZ and now BGB..

i have such a great life! trouble is a friend of mine..

so, now i'm trying to get off my hands with all this trouble.. no more having crushes and stuff like that.. ahahahaha..

dates..?? hmm.. i don't mind going on dates, but i'm not gonna hope for anything.. hehehehe

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

it's over!!

this past couple of days have been the most nerve-wrecking, unthinkable, crazy days of my life.. it was a very crucial time for me as the results for my final exam, 3rd trimester, first year is coming out..

i was really nervous, cos i felt like i did not performed my best.. made a lot of mistakes in the papers, n some of it i didn't have any confidence at all in answering them..

really felt like i am going to sit for supplementary exam, but alhamdulillah, i passed all the papers.. n that's all i really need..

however, my cgpa dropped again.. from 3.5 to 3.46.. haihh.. it's been dropping each sem now, and it really freaks me out..

but oh well, i did my best i guess, knowing that i tried my best, n i studied really hard for this papers.. mayb i didn't aim that much, that's why i took it less seriously, than before.. huhuhu..

whatever it is, it's all been done, n i'm truly grateful for what i get.. n congrats to my sis too cos she is officially a graduate now!! woohoo!! congrats sis! will be waiting for 080809.. hehehe..

n i'm making a promise to myself that i will work even harder than ever next sem to increase back my cgpa n gpa.. hopefully i will not make it drop again.. n u guys r the witnesses to my promise here..

library n foyer, here i come!!!!! hehehehe

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

girls just wanna have fun

a song that keeps my spirit up n makes me feel like having fun!

by :cindy lauper
I come home in the morning light
My mother says when you gonna live your life right
Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones
And girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun

The phone rings in the middle of the night
My father yells what you gonna do with your life
Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one
But girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have--

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the working day is done
Girls-- they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun

Some boys take a beautiful girl
And hide her away from the rest of the world
I want to be the one to walk in the sun
Oh girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the working day is done
Girls--they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun,
They want to have fun,
They want to have fun...

Monday, June 1, 2009

deja vu

my life especially yesterday was a total dejavu moment.. what is dejavu? deja vu is something that already happened in the past, but are happening it again today..
that is what i was experiencing yesterday, n a few days back..

ok, u know about that crush thing about AZ, well, he's in and out of my mind constantly, even when i was on my way to penang yesterday on a 2 days trip with my family there.. that itself, is a deja vu moment there, cos i had this crush on this one guy last time during school days that made me really out of my mind..

that night, i was just talking to my sister in the car, while waiting for my mom n my younger sis to buy some food for dinner.. can't remember how the issue was brought up, bt suddenly she said let's text him..

i was fooling around and gave my phone to her, without ever thinking that she really might do it.. and she did! and of course, i was hoping for him to reply it, i'd be lying if i don't!

but, he didn't reply it, which makes me even sadder thinking that he didn't want to reply my message.. ugghhh!!!! that part was a big bummer.. n i think i experienced that too last time..

and at last when we got back to the hotel room, i didn't checked my phone, until my sis had taken her bath, and he actually replied! woohoo..

n we text each other a few texts, but it felt totally like i was the guy doing all the getting to know part, and he's the girl, giving me all these answers.. the table has been turned and specifically MY table has been turned, of all the people's table.. hmmphhh..

and while texting him, i realised that i have that feeling at the exact same place as what i felt last time with my last ex..

cos last time, when i just got together with my last bf was when i was vacationing in penang with my family, and we stayed in this one suite in gurney hotel..
and yesterday, we also stayed in a suite there, which really reminded me of that geeky and bubbly feeling at that moment.. i am totally screwed!

you might think why am i feeling this way,if the last post i said was i don't feel anything about whatever is happening right now..

yes, i still don't mind about everything, but of course there will be part of me still thinks the 'what if...' situation..

what if...i try talking to him? what if..he actually likes me? what if..?what if..?what if...?what if..?

all these disturbed my feelin all day long, and i hate it, cos it's maing me weak, and i don't like that feeling cos i just got my strength..

if what happened in the past are actually gonna happened to me again, then i won't have any chances with him, and i'm gonna get heartbroken over again..
but this time, hopefully i have my sister and her friends to support me.. ehehehe..

stay strong, ME!!!!!!

Friday, May 29, 2009

how long a secret can stay a secret?

well..well.. when i thought everything is over, and i'm fine with it, that is when everything starts to be clear and making its way...

remember about the crush i had with this guy i called anuar zain i think, or AZ, can't remmber which one.. hehe.. well, remember him? ok, let's recall, the last i heard was about him liking or having something going on with this girl that i know from somewhere..

so, the story goes on from there.. i know that i can get over this guy pretty easily cos maybe because i'm still at the early stage of liking him, and i didn't put any hopes on him at all, so letting him pass was a piece of cake..

but, something made me stay.. hehe.. yesterday, me n my sis, n a few of her classmates went on a trip to some place.. and some people said that AZ might be coming with his friends, and i don't really care.. but the rest of them were hoping that if he did plan to join them all, please don't bring 'that girl' along.. lol.. and who was the emotional people now.. hehee..

and only until late at night, when we planned to surprise one of my sis' classmates with some surprise belated birthday thing, he n his friends came too.. n lucky them(or maybe it should be lucky me) cos 'that girl' didn't come.. huhuhu.. and one of his close friend's gf are a friend of mine too.. so, we started talking..

until my sis thought of why not just spilling it out to them or that friend of mine.. cos AZ kept on asking her who's the girl that my sis talked about having a crush on him... and the funny part was, and it should be a red-faced moments when some of my sis' frens giving hints that are pretty obvious if you're a fast observer.. hehehe..

so, i told my fren about him, and she was shocked that she never thought that i will be liking him.. lol.. much surprise..?? hmm.. i don't know.. i guess so..
then, she said, it is somehow a bit too late now.. n she asked me why didn't i make any moves earlier.. but the thing is, i don't see the need of telling him, i don;t know why.. hehehe..

but the whole night, i didn't really bother about his existence there as i was busy taking people's pics all around.. heheh.. seriously, i didn't bother, and i didn't think of him much that night, eventhough he was right in front of me..
i think all the hints started to make him think about the possibility that the admirer was me, cos when sometime i turned aronf and met his eyes, i saw him looking at me... i think! lol..

ok, by the end of the night, my friend's bf whom is a close friend to him (like i said earlier) was also informed about the whole admiring thing and who the girl is.. lol..

so, the next day, on the way back to cyberjaya, one of his friend(another friend of his) carpooled us back.. and obviously, on the way back home, it was 80% conversation about him, and obviously after awhile he can guessed who the girl is*pointing at myself*.. lol..

and seriously, i don't care!!! lol.. so then we went to lunch, and supposedly he joined us, but he didn't cos he overslept or soemthing like that..

n when we finished eating, my sis called him to ask him something, and then she brought up about him not joining us for lunch.. and she said she thought of telling him who's the girl during lunch and she even brought the girl there.. lol..

he said after the friday's prayer he wanna meet up with them all to jus hang out or something like that..

before i said anything, i'm not nervous at all about him knowing it, because he had someone more important now, or that's what we thought, that for me, wethre he knows about it or not, it makes no difference.. and for me, the idea of meeting up with him, was not that interesting for me, cos i pity the friend who car pooled with us cos he wanted to go home, of course.. hehe..

but because of lack of sleep and we're super tired, at the end, me, mamu, and that friend slept at lin's place while she was buzy packing up.. lol..

and i didn't realise when, but my sis n lin went out and met up with him and talked about and my sis said he played with my MR DYDY.. lol..

and apart from that, yes the secret is no longer a secret cos he knew about it already now..

regrets..?? nervous..?? hmm.. i didn't know what i should feel.. i didn't feel anything actually.. i seriously don;t know why.. we even went out for a movie after that sort-of-confession by my sis about me to him..

went to watch terminator salvation, but we went in earlier and our seats are one row behind their row( he n his friends).. oh, n guess what.?? he bought 'that gir;' too!! hahaha.. n mamu was super furious..

he was not focus watchin the show, cos he kept on checking the two of them.. lol.. and i was minding my own business, watcing that movie peacefully, withoug even thinking about him.. lol..

and the best part was the part when we went out after one hour of the show.. ahahahaha.. firstly, because mamu couldn't stand looking at the 2 of them, eventhough they're not doing anything... and secondly, my sis was not njoying the movie too.. plus, we need to get home, cos it's getting late and we were having some family dinner tonight..

so, i don't mind anything.. and it never hit me that that miht be the last time i will see him again, cos they're graduating now.. hmmm.. so, what should i be feeling..?? sad..?? happy..?? nervous..??? but the real thing is, i'm not feeling anything.. lol

Sunday, May 24, 2009


have u ever watched a movie called GOOD LUCK CHUCK? well, i'm sure u guys did!

nope, i'm not talking about that movie, nor am i saying that i just watched that movie. i wanna talk about the synopsis of the movie, and to be exact, about the CHUCK's character.. (n surely when i say chuck, ppl will be reminded by chuck as in gossip girl chuck!)

in that movie, chuck is a guy who is some sort of cursed. the curse was every girl that he ever slept with, will end up finding or meeting their soulmates right after that.. i feel that character is sooo totally like me at this moment, minus, the sleeping part of course! lol..

but in my case, the guys only need me to like him or him liking me, n VOILA! u'll get yourself a soulmate or a new gf after that... it's proven and i have a record for that.. can't recall how many guys have succeeded in getting the girl of their dreams, indirectly because of me.. i know a few of them, and i'm sure that there's also a few of them that i don't know..

u know why? i've realised this this past few months.. ever since schooldays, if i like someone, or i get together with someone, when we broke off or i rejected him, or in some cases, i got rejected (boohoo me.. lol), after that, in less than a year since that day, he will ultimately find the girl of his dreams.. yeap, n no one thanked me for that! imagine if i continue liking him or we continue our relationship, u will never meet that girl! pfft!

n now, i know it's coming back to me again.. cos in this past one month plus, the guy that i used to like, or the guy that i like currently had just go together with a girl.. ok, the guy that i used to like, got together with a girl.. the guy that i currenlty like, is actually getting to know this one girl.. unbelievable, how good am i! the guy that i'm liking now, naming, anuar zain that i used to mention before this, is currently getting to know a girl! can u believe, he didn't have a gf, or even had a cruch on any girl before this, and suddenly taraa!! he is getting to know this one girl.. and i'm sure once i get over him perfectly, they'll be together.. woohoo!! (haihh) lol..

i'm neither heartbroken, nor sad.. i feel free in a way.. free from this list of guys that me n reena created, which none of them really do exist in my life.. lol..

so, guys out there, if u want to fnd your soulmate, come n look for me.. play around with my heart, n u'll get urself a brand new girl, whom she can be ur perfect wife in the future! yeay! any heartbroken incidents that occurs r no one to be at fault, n it can be mended by itself..

hmmm.. maybe i should start charging this people, cos my heart will surely be damaged when there's so many guys around.. hmmm..

Saturday, May 16, 2009

a week to remember

i'll start off this time with a long sigh.. *siiiiiiiiggggggghhhhhh*..
it's been a very..very..long week for me.. been studying in the library this whole week.. (really..?? study..?? lol).. well, a part from studying of course there's some reason for it.. lol

yes, like i told u guys before about this "anuar zain" guy.. well, i guess, today is the last day for me to see him in campus anymore.. cos he'll be graduating after this.. *sob*sob*.. i don't know just feel like it.. i just feel like i'm not gonna see him anymore.. enough of seeing him every day at the library, but now... *sigh*

i'm neither sad nor happy.. but i don't know.. it felt like the old days again.. when i will have this crush on someone, and normally the crush will occur when i know we will end up going our own separate ways.. like during school time.. i had this so-called get to knwo this guy a few weeks before i'm leaving penang to go back schooling in kl.. n at the end of form 5, i have this huge crush on this guy, and we went our own separate ways after we grad high school.. same goes to foundation year, when i have another huge crush on this one guy, and now, we still see each other around, but not as frequent as last time, and the feelings are obviously over...

and now, right this moment.. why am i in this position over and over again.. i hate to feel this, and i was scared that i will feel like this at the end of the day, eventhough when it started off, it's just a fooling around thng with my sister.. gosh! why did i jump into that mud and got stuck in it alone..???

wait..wait.. let me get this straight.. like i said, i'm not sad, and of course i'm not in a big desperation.. its not to the level of me feeling like crying or whatsoever.. just feel like, well.. there goes my chance of knowing another great guy..

oh, didn't i tell u.. almost half of my sister's classmates know about this so-called crush thing.. well, it's not obvious, but it somehow slip, and voila! everyone knows about it, but him.. ngeh3..

i think for now, what i really wanna say to him is that thank you for making this past few weeks a great one for me.. not great as in like we hang out or anything like that.. but, thanks for making me laugh around, and feel excited about seeing him around.. never felt that for quite some time now, since bgb.. lol..

ok, i've had enough of this melodrama thing.. bac to normal life... ~grrrrrr~

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

ku ku i i i...kau kau you you you!

something sweet happened this week for me.. so, in a way it's a sweet scene for me this week.. get it..?? sweetsourscene..?? sweet scene..?? oh, forget it! lol..
what's happening..?? hmm.. i don't know where to start but i'm feeling like my real true self are coming and coming out bit by bit.. n i'm loving it..!!

haha.. all this while, i was busy searching for it, but i didn't realise that all this while i was actually searching it in the dark.. never thought of looking for the light.. but now, i've found the switch to turned it on, so i'm back baby!!! hahaha..

ok..ok.. what the hell am i feeling right now, would be ur ultimate question.. i'm feeling rather happy cos at least i know how my life are slowly leading me to.. ok..ok.. there's a guy in particular of course.. hihihihi.. i shy la!! lol.. when i saw him the first time, i thought to myself, hmm.. he's kinda cute.. and that's it.. never thought of anything more, bcos normally all this cute guys will definitely have a gf or someone special.. just like how people thought i have someone special in my life when all this while i'm open for everyone.. lol..

however, it turned out that he IS SINGLE.. of course, i found it out from his classmate.. hehehe.. so, ever since then, i always love to disturb and make this classmate's of his life with all my obsession towards him.. lol.. ok..ok.. let's give him a name.. let's call him ANUAR ZAIN or zain.. ok..ok.. i know it's a bit cliche to hear this.. i have another name for him actually, but i think, that name is starting to get pretty obvious each day.. lol..

anyway, to get things clear, i'm not that into him, ok! it's just a way of getting in the nerves of his classmate that i know, and of course simply to put colours in my life.. and that classmate of his told a few of her friends, so, yeah, it's no secret to some people.. hahaha.. but it's good actually.. at least i can have more fun fooling around.. hahaha..

and there are times when these other friends helped me out to get to know him more.. ok, maybe not to get to know him more, just simply making him notice my existence.. hehehe..

and actually, this ffoling around thing with zain actually helped me boost up my confidence to look straight in BGB's eyes and gie him the smile.. hahaha.. wait, u'll be wondering who's BGB now.. i'm not sure if i ever talked about him before, but this guy is actually a guy that i know since the first day of class in cyberjaya campus.. ok, not really know him.. we've been introduced that one time, and that's it.. but the thing is, when we were introduced, i didn't get his name! and that's why BGB came in.. where did i get the name, don't ask me! ask reena! she came out with it..

so, yeah, practically since the first sem, we saw each other alot around campus, especially at the library.. hihihi.. but we never actually talked to each other.. it's this MALU TAPI MAHU situtation where u want it, but ur shy to make the first move.. hahaha.. but it's actually funny cos i can't look at him directly in the eyes, and i'm not sure about his side.. and i don't mean to brag or perasan, but i sensed something there between us, but we never did anything.. hehehe..

so, yea, back to the zain story.. when i managed to talk to zain, which is kinda cool cos i didn't blush or anything.. what am i saying..?? it's a good sign actually that i'm not blushing cos the whole thing will be screwed if i ever blush at that particular time.. hehehe..

so, after talking to zain, i saw bgb.. i don't know where i found it, but, i found my confidence to look at him and maybe smiled at him.. a friendly smile is enough right..?? lol.. this is again reena's fault.. well, anything to do with bgb will only involve reena cos she's the reason any of this happening.. hahah..

so, yeah, i tried looking to his eyes, but his not keeping his gaze, so, i did my part actually!!! hahahhaa.. and i even smiled.. hahaha.. ok..ok..stop with this nonsense now..

practically, what i wanna say is that, i'm not currently looking for a serious relationship.. maybe in the future.. maybe even tomorrow.. just going with the flow.. it's more fun like that.. it's like watching movies, u can't wait for what's gnna happen next till it come to the ending.. hihihi..

i'm not hoping for a happy ending from any of the guys in my life, wether it's bgb, zain, or a few other guys that come along the way.. it's all the GOD's work and i leave it up everything to HIM to make me help with my life..

like my friends were saying, i'm keeping my options open.. whoever comes first and capture my heart, then i'll be all theirs.. but if they think that i'll keep on waiting..and waiting.. well, u can dream on.. cos i fall fast, and i get up fast.. if ure late, then bye bye for getting my heart, and hello, for being a new friend..

oh, a friendly reminder to some guys.. do not ask me what u should do.. do just what u want and feel right, cos that will make me feel appreciated more than asking me if i'm ok with every single thing do every single time..
ok, really need to study for finals now.. never thought that i'll open up about this issue here right now, when i wanna have my exams in less than a week!! gaaaahh!!!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

prom 09

now, the next post would be about prom night, which was 2 days after my performance for festival tari.. yes, it was one hectic week for me, thank u!! hehe..

ok, right back to the prom.. i went there
with reena, my sis( which she actually should be sitting with her friends, seriously!), nitasha, martin n ivan.. rema n arun were there too, but they sat at a drifferent table.. =(

started off with getting our hair ready at a salon in summit.. it was a very interesting one, because the guy who did our hair is actually a proffesional hairdresser, and he did a lot of famous local celebrities' hair.. ooo.. i like.. it's like i'm a very famous person all of a sudden.. hehe..
i didn't do much with my hair except for straightening it.. hihi..

not a very good picture of me actually, but the important thing is the hair.. hehe

after getting our hair done, me n my sis went to reena's house to get ready.. it was pretty late actually cos what's with the traffic jam around 6 in subang.. OMG!! luckily we made it on time.. n luckily we managed to get ready on time..

funny thing atreena's place was when we're leaving.. there's some relatives at her place, and when we went down, everyone was say
ing they all look good and stuff like that.. it felt really like prom night, where ur parents were vey proud of their daughter or son going to go for prom,and taking pics and all.. haha.. don't get me wrong.. it was a good feeling.. hehehe...

and then when we arrived there, people started to register theirselves at the counter, and acir helped us with the registration thing, cos the event was about to start...

me n ivan, oh with reena at the back.. people say if reena was not at the back it will be a great pic.. lol.. sorry reena.. =p

martin got lucky that night.. lol.. JK!!

and when we went in, we get in our seats.. too bad nits and martin was at a different table from us, which was right behind us.. huhuhu.. but, luckily, there's two empty seats at our table, so they join in our table.. yeay!!! muahahah..

so, then it's time for food.. they served chinese food,
which was superb.. the food was awesome.. but too bad we were not really into eating that night.. of course, it's prom, baby!! we wanna dance.. lol


oh there's this one time, a band, i can't recall what they are called, but they were playing dancing in the moonlight.. and that was my all time favourite song, seriously!!!! everytime i listened to that song, i can get butterflies.. hahaha.. so, me n ivan was super excited listening that song,and so ivan suggested that we go to the dance floor and dance.. screw the food! lol

and it was awesome.. the feeling at that time.. not really good in ballroom dancing and stuff like that, but what the heck.. luckily not many people were watching.. hehe..

after that song, we got back to our seats, and the wole nig
ht was more about taking pics and less of eating.. hahaha..

ok, so here's some of my favourite shots during that event..

us girls~ looking deliciously gorgeous... lol..

us~loving this pic cos it looks like some CK ad campaign.. hmmm.. and some say it can be a cover album for our band.. haha...dream on! ~edited by ivan

another CK ad campaign, perhaps..?? lol..

overall, the whole night was an awesome night.. went to MOS after the prom, cos we got free access tickets.. woohoo..
so, the place were filled with mmu students wearing dresses, coats, shirts, and evrything formal.. lol..
one great night.. thanks to my sis, nits,reena, martin, ivan, rema, arun, acir, losh and everyone i know there.. thanks for being there and make this fun event even more exciting.. =)

blog updated =p

phewww.. do u know how hard it is for me toupdate this blog.. the first time i wrote it, i don't know how, it was not posted.. darn!! ok, whatever.. let's star all over gaain, ok! starting off with the events i was apart of last few weeks.. it started off with the FESTIVAL TARI PIALA TUN DR SITI HASMAH, which was a traditional dance competition among five universities, and mmu was the host for the event.. me n a few of new and senior mmu dancers was involved in the opening and closing act for the event.. the opening act was a combination of several traditional dance element in it.. there's a bit of zapin, renek, and some other dance element..

me with the costume.. yeap, it was way bigger than my size.. lol..

and then, after the opening act, we straight away went to the backstage to get ready for our closing perfromances.. yeap, it sounded like it's a long way to go, and surely we'll be ready by then.. but we didn't know how, bu
t we ended up in a very hectic situation backstage.. what's with getting the guys ready, and helping each other with the costume.. phewww.. and if u were there, and if u notice, i left out some accessories that i was supposed to wear on my wrist and on my arms.. lol.. and the selendang that i used was a red colour one, instead of a yellow coloured one.. i couldn't find the yellow coloured one.. surely someone took it, cos kak aireen put the selendang on each chair for each dancers.. luckily i managed to find the red one, so, heck with it,just use it.. lol

but seriously, the last performance was a great one for me, i think.. what's with the support from the audiences, whom are mainly mmu students, so, surely they supported us.. hehe.. oh, i didn't mention, the last performance was a javanese dance, so there's a lot of booty shaking and what not... hahaha.. no wonder we got a huge applause from th
e audience.. but seriously now i understand when people said u can take the energy from the audience when ur performing.. it's true! when people was applauding us, we're more energetic to perform, and so, we performed the best among the best during the practices..

so, here's a few pictures of me after the performances.. during the performances pictures, i don't have.. i have the vids, but i have some difficulties uploading it here, so just go throught the pics, ya!!

me n kim after the whole event

nisa, kim, me n nini.. two of our audiences.. lol

reena, derryck,iffa n rema.. thanx for the support! eventho i dun brag about the event too much to u guys.. hihihihi..

me n my sis.. ngeeeeee!!!

oh, almost forgot the final pose for the closing performance!!!! love it!!!!! =)

and this will be my favourite picture of all of us.. well, not all of us really, cos there's some missed outs here.. huhuhu..

i hope this will not be too late to say but thanx evryone for coming and all the committees who did a great job..
thanx to the people right from my classmates to the people who are never in my class..
from my closest friends to the people whom i barely know..
and to my sister, to my sister's friends..

eventhough u guys didn't come for me in particular but thanks for the support for your other friends.. hihihi..

Saturday, April 18, 2009

3..2..1.. doze off!!!

this week is another tiring week for me.. what's with the training every single day.. n today, saturday... we had practice since morning till tonight.. and there's a lot more to come tomorrow n the day after that.. of course we had some breaks for a few hours here and there, but still, it's very..very tiring!!!

and yesterday, yo and mira, my favourite little cousins of all time came and stay over at my place.. didn't had the chance to see them at all.. or mayb just this morning, before i'm leaving back to cyberjaya.. and i didn't said anything to him, i just smiled..!! huhuhu.. i know it's weird, but both of them are like the closest cousins i've ever had.. i'm not close to other cousins, the grown-ups to be specifc. don't ask me why, cos i don't have the answers.. i think i communicate better with children than grown-ups.. hmmm... my sister told me, when they just arrived at my place on thursday night, the first thing that yo did when he entered the house was 'where's qilah?' awwww.. how sweet is that?? me n my sis really wished that yo will never grow bigger, cos he's the sweetest thing i've ever had, and i don't want to lose that just yet.. so, stay small, yo!! hehe

i've had to sacrifice my YO =p for the festival tari.. i'm not complaining at all, but it's just very tiring.. and yeah, it's good though the practice is evryday, at least we can sharpened up the steps cos some of us still couldn't get it perfectly(not saying that i'm perfect.. i might just be one of them too).. plus, with the pratice, at least i worked out, keep on sweating.. and sweating..and sweating.. hehe..and the good news is i'm actually working out doing what i love best.. DANCING!! hihii.. well, if u really know me, u'll know i LOVE to dance...!!!

omg.. my visions are getting blurrer and blurrer as i'm typing this.. super sleepy!!! ok, now, i better say bye now, before i'm out.. bye! 3..2..1..zzzzzzzz...!!!!!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009


yesterday, me n several classmates of mine went and watched jangan tegur.. it was nisa n my idea to watch that movie at first, so, we planned to go yesterday.. and then, it seemed like there's people who can't make it, so, we thought of going to watch it today..supposedly! but, i'm not sure how, but at last we made the decision to watch it yesterday evening, 4 pm show in alamanda..

me n nini arrived there around 3.45, 15 minutes before the show started, but the rest; nisa, nurul, alyp and zainal came a bit later.. the definition of later here is 4.15.. or mayb it was 4.20.. haha.. so, the movie already started.. they were late due to some difficulties =p, so we waited for them outside.. so, when we went in, the movie, obviously already started.. and it had to be the part where the whole theatre was very quiet.. it's an obvious indication that 'something' will appear anytime soon.. i didn't look up the screen, cos we were still looking for our seats.. ok, before anything, let me get this straight... the placing when we were walking down the stairs was nurul, nini, me, nisa, n alyp, while zainal was buying some food outside.. please note the placing i've given earlier, ok!

when nurul got to the line where we were suppose to seat, and we were trying to walk in to our seats, all of a sudden the silence was broken with the sound of something appearing on the screen.. and when i want to get in the seats, out of nowhere, alyp was right in front of me, practically screaming, and straight away sat at one of the seats, and was actually seating real low, u know, how when people are afraid to watch scary movies or stuff like that, they tend to move lower and lower, and taking up his shirt to close their eyes?? that exactly what he did!!!! and, the most confusing part was when did he cut in the line, and sat at the seat.. haha.. i wasn't seating yet, and beside alyp and nini(nini and nurul had their seats) so, nisa and i asked him to move in, because there won't be enough seat later when zainal coming in.. he didn't want to move, so i had to walk pass him, and sat between nini and alyp.. that was super funny!!! i was actually laughing, eventhough the movie was actually showing some 'figures with long hair' or something like that, i didn't realy see it cos i was still surprised and i still can't get over the whole scene that happened before that..

during the show, when 'ghosts' are coming out, he was saying all this word in a lot of different dialect.. he spoke kelantanese dialect, a lil bit of kedah, and some other dialects.. and i was like thinking to myself, since when he's a kelantanese..?? hahaha.. i don't know him that well, but i know enough that he's not a kelantanese.. hehe..

n with nini beside me, the one who was so doubtful of coming or not to watch the show, it was like a roller coaster ride..seriously.. with all the screaming, i really felt like i was on the roller coaster ride that i had in sunway lagoon with my friends a few months back.. hahahahah.. i'm not lying.. and what with the 'advices' given by her to the main character in the movie, when the heroin was trying to be brave enough to go and follow the sound of people crying and stuff like that.. she literally said 'JANGAN!JANGAN!' out loud, which i'm sure most of the people in the hall, could hear her clearly.. i had to elbow her to stop her from doing that, cos she just didn't realised she's doing that.. hahaha!

ok..ok.. enough of the funny scenes happened, let's get back to talking about the movie.. hmmmm.. i think it was a great movie, by one of my favourite actor turned director who did a great job in making the audience nervous waiting for the ghosts to appear.. hehe.. i must say, between jangan pandang belakang and jangan tegur, i think i prefer jangan tegur, cos it looks more surreal.. hmmm.. how can i put it..?? this movie was making me feel uncomfortable seating on my seat.. there, did i say it right..?? well, it something like that.. i'm not saying it was super scary, but it scared me a lot.. eventhough u know it's coming, it was torturing to wait for the thing to come and just attack the heroin, but it will all come so sudden, that you feel like u wanted to scream.. hehe.. so, credit to the director, actors, people behind the scene in this movie.. everyone did a great job!! woohoo.. hahaha.. so, who said malay movie are not good enough..?? it's just that they need to be given oppotunitites, and make sure that the scriot and the director and everyone in the production team are great people who can work together and produce a movie which can be a big hit..

ok, so after the movie have ended, we went out and practically laughing all the way to the toilet thinking back how WE all are making fun of ourselves.. hahaha..
and that was when i found out that, when nini wanted to get ot her seat, which was the same time as when the ghost or whatever it was (i wasn't looking, remember??), she fell down under the seats and tried to get back up again.. haha.. just imagine, u fell from your seats in the movie for no concrete reason.. meaning like, out of the blue, u fell down flat on the ground.. it's not like anyone pushed u,or something like that....riggghhhhttt...?? hmmmm.. haha..

ok..ok.. so overall, the movie was a great one, in my opinion.. it cna be funny at times, but well, if ure in that situation, u won't be aughing at all would you..??

oh, and yeah, i almost forgot.. i went for the prom queen photshoot last night.. it was only two shots session, so after about 10 or 15 minutes, we're out of that place.. heheh.. and they're going to tell the results who wll be shortlisted to actually be voted for the prom queen this friday.. hmm.. not hopinh for anything.. if it works, it works.. if it's not i'll still have fun at the prom!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

another awesome malay movie..

i just got back home from cyber this morning, and suddenly i felt like watching a malay movie called SELAMAT PAGI CINTA.. in this movie, there's two different stories in it.. one is about ilham n julia (played by fazura n pierre andrea-which are my favourite actor n actress in a movie together!).. how they met was the best.. both of them wanted to buy the same book but, there's only one book left, and both of them, wanted to take that book at the same time.. sounds a lil bit cliche right..?? bt then, ilham said that whoever gets the book must treat the other one with a drink.. so, he took the book, and he treat her for a coffee at some stall.. then they saw some people roller blading.. julia said she didn't roller blade for quite sometime now, so he take her rollerblading that instant.. there was of course hesitation from ilham, cos they just met and you're doing all this..?? it's not like ur on a date or something, it's just some accidental meet up.. but he insisted, so they went on roller blading.. after that, he asked for her number, and she said she doesn't give numbers to people that she barely know( which is so like me! =p).. and then she said, if both of them meant to meet again, she'll give her number then.. ok, somehow, he managed to get his number cos they meant for each other..i will not tell the whole story here, because it's too long, but i'll skip to the proposal part, and that was a day after they met up earlier just now! he said, he wants to marry her cos he feels he had found the right one for him, and that is her.. he's afraid that he might lose her again (because of some reason during the night in the movie) so, for that reason, he wants to marry her.. he borrowed a coin from some guy there, and he said he'll flip the coin 3 times and if it shows the tail, then, she must marry him.. and guess what..?? yeap, bulls eye..! they were meant to be together.. ok, the way i narrate it here might sound a bit tacky, but, when i watched that movie, *sigh* that was what i was waiting for all this while.. believing that when the right person come, there will be a lot of ways that will somehow make us stay together.. hehehe.. and the rest of the story...ummm... i won't tell.. there's a lot to it after that, but if you wanna know watched it yourself! hehe

the other story is about suci and azam, played by sharifah amani, and que haidar.. it's a story about 2 college students who had alwasy like each other, but they never said anything.. so, azam one day, made the move and ask her out.. they went out and he told her that he is more than just liking her..closer to love, he said.. (awwwww...) there are some conflict between them, which i can;t say either.. hihi.. sorry la! if u wanna watch that movie, just tell me, i'll pass it to u k! hahaha..

but, yeah one superb movie, especially the first story cos i feel like it's closer to me in away.. cos like i said earlier, and i said to a lot of people who had always been asking me about guys, and why am i still single, and why i said no to a few guys and stuff.. cos i am just waiting for the right guy, i figured that out this new year, after a lot of doubting and questioning and feeling depressed(yes, i admit i was depressed at the end of last year..haha!). i believe that when the right guy turns up, i'll know it that instant.. and even if i don't know it instantly, there will be away sooner or later than that that i realise that he's the one for me.. get it..?? i believe in destiny, so, i'll just follow where it is bringing me.. so, right now, i'm still waiting for the right guy, whom i don't know yet.. it can be someone far from me, or it can't also be a guy that i've known since i was small.. who knew??? so, don't ask me all thos questions again, ok!

EXHAUSTED is my middle name

aaaaaaaggggghhhh..!! super exhausting week i had this week.. what's with 3 midterm papers this week, and with dance practice.. and what's with my french assignment, that i only knew the date of submission 3 days before the dateline.. and my partner for the assignment didn't know about it too..!! hahaha.. luckily i actually remembered to check the due date in mmls on monday.. oh well, it's not that hard considering it's just writing an essay about your hometown.. hehe..

midterms was hardcore moments.. monday macroeconomics, wednesday managerial accounting, n thursday acounting information system.. phewww..!! the papers are actually not that bad, but like always, i never put high hopes on any exams or tests or quizzes i did before this.. it's good enough that i know that i tried my best.. hihihi.. the scariest paper was AIS.. cos we had to do the midterm in the computer lab, cos we need to use this one accounting software.. that was very nerve wrecking, cos me + computer subjects... never goes well.. i'll end up panicking and stuff,even if it's tutorial.. haha.. but, luckily i managed to do it.. not sure of the answers, but, yeah like i said, i tried my best.. thanks to kim cos she helped me the night before that.. suddenly i was super blur that night, and she managed to help me to go through the blur moments.. hahaha.. oh, n nisa too.. cos we were practically discussing how to do the questions online.. haha..

just hope i did all the paper well enough.. well enough that it will help my results during finals, and also well enough to not make me feel proud and feel i'm good with that subject, that will make me end up not doing good during finals..

now, all the midterms over, it's time for assignments!! oh no!! and this weekend, i had a lot of stuff i need to do..
get prom dress, accesories, shoes and everything i need.. oh, did i mention that i was voted as prom queen.. haha.. don't think anyone will vote for me!! haha.. all the nominees need to go for a photoshoot this monday in campus.. so, i need to thin carefully what i should wear.. hahaha..
n what's with the hard core dance practice, cos the performance day are getting nearer and nearer.. can't wait for it actually.. hihihi..

oh, wait assignments!! aahhh, i'll start doing it next week.. hahaha.. that is sooo typical me..!! *sigh*

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

it's a new day, it's a new life

last week, hmm.. it's pretty rough for some people who are close to me.. i don't know why, but there's a lot of stuff going on last week.. first, khairul, one of my closest guy friends in school text me and said that his dad was admitted to the hospital and right now in a very bad condition.. for the past few years of knowing him, i'm a ware that his dad had some heart problems.. and his dad went through several surgeries before this too.. so, it's not an all of a sudden issue.. bt it was sad to hear that someone's dad, who is very close to me, was actually lying on the bed and is hoping for the best thing to happen.. well, k-rul, hope ur dad will be fit in no time, n hope u n ur family stay strong going through this hardship..

and that's not it, a few days later, i received a text message from another close friend of mine whom i know since primary school, that her dad had passed away on friday.. now that was a big shocker because before this she never said anything about his dad being sick or whatsoever, probably because i haven't seen her around for awhile.. i felt really bad for not going to her house and expressed my condolences personally to the family, but i'm short of time on doing so, cos there's a lot of stuff going on last weekend.. to shah, my biggest condolences goes to out to you and your family.. stay strong girl, cos i know you are..

well, last week ended up pretty gloomy too for some people in my family.. my cousin, who was one of the closest to my family, especially my sis and my dad, had a big tragedy happened.. i don't know how to put it to not offend anyone, but it was a huge break-up.. well, it's not like, we, kids are experiencing now.. it's a break-up after u were married fo five years.. yes, that!! it turned out to be a huge impact in our family cos it's a first time in our family.. well, beside my uncle on my mother's side who had divorce before, whom his kids were hottest cousins i have on my mother's side,(damn!!) but they were now living with my uncle's ex-wife, so, we couldn't really meet them that much.. ok..ok.. calling for me back to earth! please stop sidetracking my story.. hehe.. so, well, yeah, it's a tragedy for her and her family.. but, it was pretty amazing how strong she is dealing all this eventhough she's preganant with their 3rd child right now..?? guys!! they really like to do what they feel like doing huh..?? hmmm.. whatever it is, it's good that my cousin are standing tall now, without thinking of the past.. seriously, she deserves someone waaaayy..waaayyy.. better than him.. god let u screw up at times so that u'll learn the lesson of life.. so, now, she's not the only one who learnt the lesson.. everyone around her does, including me.. it's somehow like a wake up call for everyone.. yes, i'll admit that, she can never leave her past at the roadside, but at least now, she can totally see and feel free from all the thorns and muds are always trying to pull her under..way down under from where she is.. coussy, there are a lot of hands around you, to pull you back out from the sinking mud, and hands who will cut off all those bad thorns around you.. she have everyone on her side, so no worries.. well, everything happens for a reason, so, sooner or later, we will all know the reasons for it, or maybe you did figure out the good outcomes from all this..

well, this goes out to everyone actually.. sometimes when we think it's the worst thing that ever happened to us, it can be the best thing ever happened.. everyone( and this goes out to me too) stay strong k!! whatever happens there's a lot of people around you you can count on, and i hope one of the people will be me, and i hop you will be for me too when i needed someone to grab me from falling down..down..down.. =)

Thursday, April 2, 2009

fast n furious, baby!!

u see, this past few days, me n derryck planned to go karaoke or een watch movie or just simply hang out like the good old days, like what we did last semester.. hehe.. but, nothing we planned come true, cos no one wanted to join us.. reena was busy with her studies.. n even if rema, tag along, only the 3 of us..?? not fun enough to karaoke.. lol.. so, today, i went and accompany derryck to midvalley, just checking what he loves best.. SHOES..!!hehehe. it's cool to actually see all this very cool shoe designs.. no wonder guys can be so addicted to it.. hahah.. we didn't do much actually, except for wandering around and lookat shoes here and there.. and i don;t feel like window shopping or shopping at all, cos if i wanna shop, i need my own time, n i need to have the mission.. haha.. oh, and at last all my stories about my life have been updated to derryck.. finally!! hahah.. he's the easiest guy for me to talk to about anything, even my girl's stuff.. hahah.. so, thanks derryck, ya!! haha.. since we had a lot of spare time before his next class at 4, we planned to go n watch movie.. when we arrived at gsc, baamm! fast n furious..!! haha.. we got in the line and when we got right in front of the counter, the first thing he asked, beside what movie, the guy who's at the counter asked us if we wanted couple seat.. hahah.. i wonder why, it must always be like that, when a guy n a girl went out together, and watched movie alone.. haha.. very funny.. and derryck straight away said no, and i was laughing at the corner.. lol.. when we bought the tix, it was 11.40, n spot on! the movie is practically starting.. so, we grab the popcorns, and went in.. the movie was superb!! not a dissapointment for me at all..!! hehe.. i'm not a huge follower of the fast n furious saga, but, ike i said, not a dissapointment at all..
and after the movies, we went around for a little while before we left back for campus.. and i didn't even think of having lunch at all.. haha.. after i got back to my room, after a few minutes, my stomach started to grumble.. haha.. so, we went arif to eat.. heheh.. and tonight, like always went for dance practice, and the teacher who taught us practically changed half of the choreography of the song tonight! and we had to get the new steps again.. *sigh*.. oh, lik i said earlier, i don't know why, but i really feel like going karaoke this week, so, since i have my headphone with a mic.. i took out the headphone wire, n just plugged in the mic wire, and went to youtube and find karaoke songs! hahaha.. at first, there was only me, sha, nisa n nini in the room, n i was the only one did the karaokeing, and they were 'enjoying' my performance.. hahah.. and then nisa went back, n kim came in.. n then nisa came in again, and at last we all sat and sing along together.. to whatever songs we felt like singing.. mariah carey, i will survive song, circus, a little bit of dangdut here and there(cos i'm a huge fan of dangdut) and even itik gembo gembo song! well, if u dunno what's that song, it was once a very popular song in malaysia, and the tune is super catchy.. lol..
overall, had a great day.. i need to do this more often... =p


22 march 2008 - ok, from now on, my blogs will be prohibited(hopefuly that'll work) about talking about other people or even give my opinion about other people.. easy! no one will get hurt, n i won't be affected by the 'hurt process'.. fullstop! lol ok, now, talking about me, n nothing than me.. as stated on the date(chewaah), it was a sunday, me n a few of my new friends i made(weeeee..!! lol) did a performance on mmu open day at mmu grand hall.. well, i never said anything about this practice before right..?? it's just that i always forget to update my blog la.. hehe.. ok, so, talking about my dancing performance thing.. we had practiced every tuesday n thursday night for a few months now.. on that day, that was my first dance performance i was involved with after for oh-so-long of not dancing in front of public.. lol.. not many people know this, but dancing is somehow one of my passion in life.. when dancing, i can let loose, n be myself n show what i can do best with my body.. hehe.. n it's one way for me to have a few hours away from all the stress in life or studies or whatever shit.. doesn't matter what kind of dancing, i'm on it! even ballroom dancing! which reminds me of the ballroom dancing lesson i wet once with reena.. how funny does that look when ur partner is actually a girl too.. hahaha.. it's ok, but it's weird when other people are bringing their partner during that lesson.. lol.. and without even people knowing it, i am never shy of dancing in front of people.. it's just that people see me as they so-called-shy person n quiet person, that they don't know im capable of doing it.. just ask my closest friends, no one would've thought i could let loose to that point.. lol.. ok, back to my story.. so, yeah, we praticed every week.. n we learned different types of dances, depends on how fast we can catch-up.. mostly we learned traditional dance, cos i think it'll be easier later in the future if they wanted dancers to perform, they don't have to teach everything all over again each time there's performance.. on that day, we performed zapin n canggung dance.. canggung was ok, n for that dance, u need a partner, but i don't find it a big matter, cause who cares, it's a matter of enjoying myself right..??lol.. n for zapin, we didn't have a partner.. but zapin was much more crucial dance than canggung.. zapin really involves a lot of squatting n quicly get up, n squat back, n u need a lot of ATTITUDE.. hehe.. my leg was in pain, that it was hard for me to walk down the stairs.. one of the dancers, nad, had even spraint her ankle, but she still want to perform, so, she performd with a bandaged leg, when everyone else was barefooted.. lol.. but it was great fun.. getting ready was one of the best times la.. getting ready, putting on make-up, doing my hair, was one of the best things.. hahaha.. well, of course apart from dancing cos nothing can beat the feeling when performing on stage.. hahaha...
although a few days before the performance we had some difficulties of getting the steps right, but at last we managed to do it well.. well, it's considered good enough when all of us are amateurs.. lol..
but, it was one hell of a day!! and on that night, i had to be an usher for my second cousins wedding.. well, not a big deal, cos i was only the present-taker.. lol.. n actually i didn't do much.. aadeq did most of the receiving.. i just had to put it in order on the table.. hahaha.. but it was one hell of a day.. super tired.. but it was one great day for me i guess.. i had fun during the, i'm practicing for another performance that i'm going to perform on 22nd april at the grand hall.. buy the tix.. it's only rm5!! hehehehe.. i'll do the opening perfromance, n also the javanese dance.. wich me luck!!! =)

Saturday, March 14, 2009

girl's drama

to all the guys out there.. did you know how hard it is to be a girl..?? well, if you really observe girls, i think you'd understand how hard it is to be a girl.. how complicated and unpredictable girls can be..?? ok, complicated n unpredictable, people can still overcome that.. but, how about being emotional..?? wooahh, that's the hardest thing about being a girl maybe.. soemtimes, we didn't even realised we're actually being emotional for no reason... one after another will be your victim of this weird feeling that you have inside.. well, i'm not saying being emotional is bad, but there must be a solid reason for that.. if you don't even know the real situation, and you're just being "dramatic" as i will call it, just because you interpret things wrongly, then don't blame others for that.. one more funny thing about being emotional and dramatic is you'll start cursing and wishing that that other person will feel the same way you feel now, one fine day.. isn't it funny..?? haha.. i find it very amusing.. one good thing about being too emotional is that u will somehow knows other people's sensitivity about stuff.. cos with you being emotional, you can actually know what can make other people feel bad or hurt, cos you'll know that if other people did that to you, you know that it'll hurt.. but, knowing girls, we're just human who are full with envy and jealousy among each others, soooo.. you just screw them for being hurt about what you said.. see, how confusing girls can be.. you don't want people to hurt you, but at the same time, you're actually hurting other people, so that that other people will feel what you feel.. immature.. yes, you can say that too.. but, what can we do, we're just like that.. however, don't just blame others for what you feel or what you do.. look back and think what you've done before this that might hurt other people.. maybe some other people who you've hurt before is not being a drama queen as much as you are, i mean, you are totally in a very different league from all of us, cos the other people you've hurt before this tried to suck it all in, and just forget about it.. no need to brag it out in public... but, just look at the word QUEEN.. queen is the one, no one can disobey them and they'll do whatever they want.. and they can let the whole kingdom know how you feel so, that's how i feel about a drama queen too.. just the same thing, but just more drama.. wooahh, that is a lot more worse than being just a queen.. haha.. drama queen is the ultimate queen.. hahah.. so, drama queens out there, or should i say your highnesses, just take a few minutes to be any ordinary citizen, and look back how other people actually feels.. see, and you say being a girl is much easier than being a guy..!!

Monday, February 23, 2009

the day the rain finally arrived...

it was like any other ordinary monday in cyberjaya, where my day is packed with classes from early morning to evening.. thank god, it's a bit windy today, so i didn't feel that hot as much as i felt last few weeks.. before my last lecture class starting, i really did not have the mood to go, and i really took my time going for class.. half way throguh the class, all of a sudded, it was raining heavily outside without any of us in the class realised, cos the door was shut, and there's no window in fomcr.. hehehe.. and suddenly nini got a message from sha, our new roomie(hihihi) that the window at my side of the table in the room was not closed, and my sister's laptop was on the table.. like any other days when it rained in cyber, surely, the rain managed to get through the room, if the window is opened.. so, clearly i couldn't focus in class(well, actually, i never really could focus in that class.. lol) and my sister told me earlier she couldn't get in the room because she got no key to my room.. and my key, without even i realising it, i left it on the table of my study table in my room.. so, it's a bit hectic right that moment.. and i did feel like i wanna ditched the class and get out of the class earlier, cos i really couldn't focus, even before the rain came down.. bt no...i never bother about my instinct right there.. so, because of this hecticness, i decided to walk back to my hostel room, and see how to deal with this problem.. and this was the day when i decided not to drive my car to class.. *sigh* and as i was walking halfway back to hostel, my sis sent a message saying that she managed to enter the room, by asking the people who take care of the hostel thing, for a spare key.. so, since i was already halfway back, i didn't want to go back to class.. of course not, after what i've gone through.. the hardship of going through the rain.. so, as i was walking down the stairs, and i was nearing my hoetle block, that was when the BEST thing happened.. i tripped on the stairs and slide down a few steps of tje stairs on my right ass, and elbow.. my file dropped(thank god i didn;t bring any books), and i helped myself up.. what really pissed me off was that there were a few guys in front of me, and no one even bother to help me.. ok, maybe there's one guy asked me wether i'm ok or not.. the other guy, he just turned, and saw what happened, and turned back again and continue his way back.. the most pissing off moment was that, my file was right beside his leg at that time... gahhh..!! thanks for the help, i guess..!! grrrr.. and i was like in total pain, and i almost cried right that instant, but i managed to suck it in, until when i got back to the room, and saw my sister.. and i couldn't suck it anymore and i burst out crying.. omg!! and it turned out that her laptop was fine, because the curtain helped to cover her laptop from the rain.. and now, my right side ass is super swollen.. i can totally feel the different.. hahaha.. and i couldn't even sit properly, without being very careful..
and when i was in the car, a slight bump will make me screaming out loud.. hahaha.. but it was not a good experience.. what's with the embarassment and the pain.. ughhh..!! i was complaining the whole week last week how cyber is super hot that i couldn't stand it.. and today, when the rain finally came down, i fell on the stairs and hurt myself.. haihh.. so, the moral of the story is, follow your instinct.. if your guts say you should ditch class.. then maybe you really should do that... hmmm..

Friday, February 20, 2009

happy belated valentine's day!!!

it's not too late for me to wish everyone a very happy belated valentine's day!!! well, it's actually kind of a bit late right considering it was a week ago.. hahah..
somehow, this year, this 2009, i had THE BEST V-DAY EVER!! thinking back this past few years, i never got lucky on v-day.. i think i had fun on 14th feb was only once, and that was when i was in form 2, which was when i was 14, and which also means, 6 years ago.. so you do the math how not great was my v-day this past few years.. i think v-day was a bit devastating for me last few years, is because i was feeling miserable and i thought a lot of how i don't have a bf on v-day and stuff like that.. but, this year, it's a brand new year, and a brand new spirit baby!! i never felt as this free for like...forever!! hahahaha.. don't get me wrong, it's not like i had a date or something on that day.. well, maybe i did have a date on that day...oh well, i'll get back to that part later.. but the main reason for me to have the best v-day ever in history was because early this year, i made a resolution that i'll just stop being sad and questioning why haven't i found the one for me yet, when every single person around have someone beside them.. i just realised, it was the most tiring and wasting time experience ever.. today, i finally realised that i should enjoy every minute of my singlehood and being with family and friends life, cos who knew what will happen in the future.. it's not like i've given up in guys or anything like that, it's just that i'll just chillout right now.. if the right guy comes around, it'll happen.. if not, i'll just chill some more.. no more looking around, just walk through life without having to stop and look around the bushes to find something that's not there cos it's just a waste of time.. hehehe.. ok, back t the story of why i was happy on 14th feb was because my dad got 2 free tickets to watch the musical theatre of PUTERI GUNUNG LEDANG.. i've always wanted to watch that show, but all this while, it got sold out at a nick of time.. and lucky me, my dad got 2 free tix this year, and what's even better was the shoe was on valentine's day!! it was the perfect gift ever..!! haha.. and who was my date to the show..?? duhh!! oviously my sister..!! my older sister i mean.. and i had a very gr8 night that night.. that show, for me, was a very beautiful one.. of course, there's some part when it was a bit too draggy and my sister almost fell asleep, but overall it was a great show.. well, i think one main reason why i love the show was because it brought us through the hardship of true love.. and knowing me, u would know, i have this thing about true love tales and it made me feel...awwwwww... hahaha.. and knowing me as a new person, i didn't feel grawky or anything like that at all.. i just felt that, one fine day, i'll find my own true love,and i'll have my own tale to tell.. hehehe.. for me, it ws one of the best way to celebrate v-day, and i think if they'll have it again next year, i think i'll go again and book the tickets on 14th feb.. by that time, who'll be my date, i don't know just yet.... hmmm... lol.. oh, and apart from that, someone gave me 2 white roses straight from malacca. ok, it's from cameron highlands, but it transit at malacca.. hahaha.. martin gave me the white roses.. weeeeee.. he gave me n reena the white roses.. thanx a lot martin!! really appreciate it.. and eventhough it dried out and died, i still keep it in my room.. hihihii.. so, how much more perfect my v-day can be when i've watched a love saga in theathre , and i've received roses, without even having me to ask for it.. well, not like before this i ever asked anyone to buy for me roses.. wel, maybe once when i was in form 5, when i simply asked a couple of my guy friends to buy me roses instead of chocolates.. lol.. ok, that's it..and as a big lesson for me, i don't need a man, a guy, or a boy to make me feel happy on special occasions.. as long as i have the people i loved all around me, who needs more than that...??

so little time, so many stories!

i think i've said this a gazillion times.. but i haven't update my blog for awhile now it seems.. hehehe.. me n a few of my classmates were talking in class the other day, how we've been a bit lazy to update blogs.. n yes, i was the longest who didn't update her blog.. lol.. not that i don't have any stories to tell.. it's just that there's not enough time or somehow writng the blog slipped form my to-do list every now and then.. hehehe.. hurmm.. i think only for today, i'll be posting a few posts to update every single great memories i had this past couple of months.. ehehe.. so, the first one now i think i'll be talking about my new passion.. well, i've been doing this for a few months now.. it looks like i have a big passion for twilight novel series nowadays.. i know the books have been out for quite awhile now.. and i've seen the book before this, but i don't know why, i never had the feeling to go and grab it and take it to the counter and bought it.. hehe.. and what a big mistake that was for not buying the book before this.. i'll admit, after watching the movie, i was curious about the whole movie thing, so i tried to read book one forst, which was the TWILIGHT.. and to my own surprised, it was one of the best love stories i've ever read.. so, i continued with book 2, n i've been addicted to it that i continued with book 3 n book 4, which was the eclipse and breaking dawn.. and no one really know the trouble i had to go through to buy all the books, to get all four books, especially eclipse and breaking dawn.. i had to ask the people in mph to reserve me the books, cos it sold out when i went there... and when the book was in, obviously, i went there, and bought it.. lol.. before this, i never liked reading all this unrealistic stuff that will never happened in real life.. but when i was reading the book, i felt like it was all real, and it was about an ordinary girl having an ordinary life, with no wizards an stuff.. it's just that she realised that she had fallen in love with a vampire.. and no to mention, the werewolves were there too.. with the whole plot that was in today's life, in this 21st century life, it really made it all soo surreal.. and it was a wonderful thing too.. hehe..i remembered when i was reading the book, and when i came to the part when edward cullen(who is the main character and the vampire) left bella (the heroin who was the ordinary girl) because he do not want to put her in danger with all the vampires around.. when i read that part, and suddenly i had to stop reading the book for awhile because i had to do some other stuff for awhile, i was all sulky and moody and somehow...sad.. like edward cullen left ME.. hahah.. that was funny when i looked back, but it just shows how crazy i am with all this characters, and of course edward cullen, who was by far the most perfect guy ever!!! screw romeo..screw prince charming..screw superman and spiderman.. i want my very own edward cullen now!! hahaha.. and up till today, i can't remember how many times i have read over and over again all the four books.. and the funny thing was normally i need some story books to make me got to sleep, but reading this twilight saga, it couldn;t make me sleep at all.. it jus made me want to go on and on.. haha.. a big credit to stephenie meyer for having a great imagination and made it look soooo.. reality and not out of the world kind of thing.. hahaha..
well, that's it about the books, i'll be continuing with another story shortly..

Monday, January 5, 2009

so many stories in a month

hurmm.. where do i start..?? hurmm.. can i jus start by saying i'm having exam tomorrow..?? two papers, n instead of studying i feel like writing my blog, which i didn't update for more than a month now.. oh ya, anyway, HAPPY NEW YEAR!! heheh.. i know it's like almost a week already since 2009 had begun, bt hey, it's never too late, right..?? lol.. this couple of weeks is full with memories.. good memories, bad memories, everything.. i cried, i laughed, i did crazy stuff with my sisters.. i've liked someone, i've lost interest on someone, celebrating ppl 's birthday, celebrating xmas.. n many other stuff, n it's hard to update evry single thing.. bt i'll try my best k.. towards the end of last year, it has been a big bummer to me.. i did mention b4 dis that i think i like someone now, bt it seems like that will never happen, cos we're cool as frens, n i'm more open when i am friends with the guy.. relax..relax.. i'm not heartbroken for the gazillion times now.. lol.. it's jus a temporary feeling b4 it hit me dat it'll be never go further than a friendship thing.. hehehe.. so, dat ended up well.. d bummer part was actually d fact that somehow, n sometimes, i feel i'm all alone in this world.. yes, i know b4 dis, i dun really care cos i got my friends around.. bt how long can a friend stick by you, cos they will eventually have their own personal n private life to entertain.. n i broke down a couple of times jus bcos of dis matter.. stupid, eh..?? but, one day, it hit me dat, no matter how alone i will be my friends will always be there for me, evnthough i dun wanna kacau their life at d moment.. heheh.. they're really good friends, sticking by me through the goods n d bads.. evry single one of my friend.. hehehe.. ok..ok.. stop dis emoing moment.. lol.. so, to stop me from feeling down n stressing on dis matter, i had a list of brand new new year's resolutions.. first, i wanna try to lose weight.. try as in i dun wanna force myself on doing it jus for the sake of impressing ppl.. i wanna go on a diet for my own good.. ppl can say whatever they wanna say cos they jus dunno what to say to me, so they alk about my weight.. lol.. n i won't care for the people who thinks too much about being skinny n all, n jus dun look at d beauty behind all dis.. n i'll ignore ppl who were not encouraging me to stay fit for myself, n not for others.. don't wanna elaborate much on dat, let's jus this be it.. =)... my next resolution is to try n mingle around with others, n know more ppl.. i mean, i shouldn't keep on asking myself why am i still alone, what hav i done b4 dis, that makes me in dis kind of situation, n stuff like dat.. so, instead of feeling low, i should start mixing with ppl.. go on dates with my friend's friend..or anyone dat i know, who r open to jus date.. if it works out ok, then it's ok.. n if it didn't work ouy, hey, i make new friends.. n my last resolution is i wanna stop feeling like a bummer each day.. i need to cheer up n live to the fullest.. njoy d moments, n cherish it.. hihihi.. haishh.. i am totally in a very semangat mood.. evrything i do is to put myself first, n find d missing pieces for all my questions that i hav been asking myself d whole of 2008.. hihihi.. n as far as i'm concerned, 2009 started very well for me.. i'm in full gear to start a brand new life..a brand new me.. =) bt when i am jus njoying d moment, dat was when drama will occur.. sometimes ppl can't jus accept rejection.. n it's not even a rejection.. bcos if it is, i'll surely ignore u from d first moment i met you.. at least i still wanna make friends, with you, n dat's a good start right..?? u jus hav to respect my principe in life, n i won't change my principe jus bcos of a guy.. then i will be unfair to all d ppl i've said that to.. chill la.. there's a lot of ways to communictae nowadays.. n u're jus being childish about it.. i never said NO to you, it's jus that it's my damn principe.. haishh... ok..ok.. *breath in*breath out* i wanna have a great n chirpy life remmbr..??? huhuhu... hurmm.. at d moment, i'll let you cool down n try to forget me from your mind jus bcos u couldn't get what you want (note that, don't think about what the thiing that he wanted, it's not to THAT extreme, ok! it's jus something small n if u know it, u'll know that guy is somehow not thinking rationally).. so, yea, screw him.. i need to enjoy life.. =)